My essay’s most notable strength was my personal experience in my introduction. It was able to hook my reader in. I wrote, “My younger brother is confined to a wheelchair, as he has cerebral palsy. Every time we go out into the world as a family, we always get some stares. As I started to get older I would try and decipher the stares. Some meant “Oh I’m so sorry you have to deal with this” or “Wow”, but most…
My final thesis statement was: Social media has its benefits, however, its excessive usage desensitizes, causes personal communication deficiencies, and negates the ability to recognize social cues. I feel like my thesis is concise and has specific ideas. It could have more pizazz and be more detailed. I learned that I tend to ramble on in my writing. This essay prompt helped me figure out how to be specific in my writing (i.e using quotes to help my specific ideas)….
